Should Men Help Their Partner With Cooking?

A lot of modern wives think their husbands should be able to cook and should certainly help out with the cooking in the house. It’s not like before when people thought boys and men didn’t belong in the kitchen.

Many women don’t require their husband to cook in the home but they let him do it when he wants to. They think there’s nothing wrong with having your man in the kitchen to give you a hand, and this is fine because some men are fine cooks and they don’t mind at all.

However, some men object to that. Let’s assume you get home from work late one day and your husband asks you what you both will be eating. You tell him honestly that you’re very tired and don’t have the strength to cook anything. Would he understand and go into the kitchen to do you both some food? Some men would yell at you if you say a thing like that.

Having your man in the kitchen doesn’t have to be a requirement. They’ve got to assist of course, but it’s not like you have to actually split the kitchen work with them. Think about if his friends or family come around and meet him in the kitchen when you’re around. Would you be comfortable with that? Many women wouldn’t be comfortable with that. So there you go.

Women obviously don’t like it when a man is not useful in the house. It’s annoying to be with a man who doesn’t want to lift a finger to do anything in the house and wants you to do everything. Such guys want their partner to wait on them hand and foot. They wouldn’t cook or do their own dishes and their house would be a mess. That sort of thing can be really infuriating.

It’s just like men who have the idea that their wives are there to be their cook and that helping them with the work is beneath them. That’s a really sexist orientation and no man should think like that.

However, there are some men who know how to cook and want to cook, but their woman doesn’t think it’s appropriate for their man to cook for them. There are a lot of conservative ladies like that who’d rather let the man watch TV while they do all the work.

I think men should help their wives with cooking or other housework more often. Couples should help each other. It’s a sign that they love each other and really care about each other.  I have a cousin whose husband would clean the house and cook the meals sometimes. She doesn’t tell him to. He just does. That’s what I’m talking about.

But some men are cautious about cooking for their wife because they think if they give their spouse an inch, she’ll take a whole kilometre. They want to assist, but they don’t want the wife to cash in on that and start assigning chores to them as a habit. One day you offer to do the dishes. If you do it a few more times, one day your wife would ask you if you could come with her to the market to buy some foodstuff, and then soon you’ll be doing the cooking half the time. The feeling that things might get to that level is something that deters some men from helping their wife with cooking and all that kind of stuff.

There’s a scene in the movie Half of a Yellow Sun where Mama Odenigbo visits her son in the city and finds his male house help cooking in the kitchen. She tells him, “I know you try, but you’re only a boy. What does a boy know about real cooking? Does a boy belong in the kitchen? A boy does not belong in the kitchen.”

The movie is set in 1966 before the Nigerian civil war. That’s over 50 years ago and things have changed pretty much with the increase in civilisation.

Now does a man belong in the kitchen? No, he doesn’t, and neither does his wife. Nobody belongs in the kitchen except if cooking is their job. It’s time we began to have another look at the way we think about women and their role in marriage.

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